It can be your downfall

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Photo by Kyle Broad on Unsplash

Most of us aspire to think the best of others. We know it’s the higher ground, the ‘right’ thing to do. Others we even put on pedestals, having ourselves shrink in comparison.

Some of these high judgments and unrealistic expectations can also backfire on us. We can feel disappointed in them, possibly rejected, deflated, and angry.

In hindsight, if we are bold at reassessing after the fact, we may have the insight that we’d set ourselves up for this fall.

“Unrealistic expectations are like pre-meditated resentments. Just waiting to pounce!” Anon.

The visceral height of our emotions we feel when disappointed directly correlated with our level of expectation. …

Optimism really does make the world go round

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Photo by Miguel Bruna on Unsplash

Can you imagine trying to get things done — but without optimism? I can’t. People need optimism to feel energized; so they can work with enthusiasm towards a goal.

I suspect that optimism was the secret sauce for most successes in life. I can’t imagine titans of industry without burning optimism, believing in that next project or dream.

Even goal-setting without optimism seems, at the very least, a half-hearted concept.

But enough of what ‘without optimism’ looks like. Let’s look at what optimism brings to our lives.

“Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence.”– …

We were fortunate to partake in that regal pastime—once

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Photo by Peter Conlan on Unsplash

As a kid, I lived a strange, contradictory childhood, in that my four siblings and I lived on welfare with my single mother. But my grandparents (on her side) owned a few farms in Wales and a castle in Scotland.

They were probably millionaires on paper for a while—but alas, lost it all later in life.

So we got a glimpse of how the other side lived, certainly not in luxury, they were farmers after all, but with few worries about living hand-to-mouth.

We definitely lived on the other side of those tracks and felt it deeply at times. As a child, one can’t quite reason this out, the difference in lifestyles, and sometimes we have a hard time understanding these facts of life. …

Medium has helped me figure out some of these heady propositions

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Image by Jill Wellington from Pixabay

Had you have asked me ten years ago what I thought my purpose in life was, I’d have given you a blank stare, thought that was a provocative question, and been somewhat defensive in my responsive.

In reality, I had no reason for being on this earth; no purpose other than being that worker bee.

I was a family member, but in name only. It certainly wasn’t in my mind why I was put on earth. It was a component of my life, but it didn’t feel like my calling.

So it’s with some sense of achievement that I can announce today that I do have purpose. …

A skeptic reconsiders with a somewhat open mind

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Photo by Lê Tân on Unsplash

Am I a believer in the Supernatural or Paranormal? — not really.

But unlike less curious times in my life, I’m at the very least, intrigued by how my brain is wired around this topic.

So whereas I always assumed that was the mainstream thinking on the subject, check out these stats from a 2019 survey from YouGov.— Hardly a spoof site:

45% of Republicans (I’m not making this a political article in any way, just quoting from this research) believe in demons, whereas 37% of Democrats do. …

Taking a step back crystalized life for me

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Photo by JESHOOTS.COM on Unsplash

I was going to dash off an article about the power of quiet. I was aiming primarily for quietness as a personal quality and the power it can have with those within their circle.

But my muse had other plans. It quickly shifted to the lack of quiet in our minds due to life’s many stressors.

This lack of quiet, due to the constant attention technology demands can impact our lives just as adversely as that construction team drilling the pavement. We see these things very differently, one being a choice and the other being forced upon us. …

Says a man with contentment on his mind

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Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

I find that even the thought of blissful happiness is a scary prospect.

Honestly, being supremely happy sounds dangerous, untrustworthy. It’s a state I will no doubt fall off and it will be followed by disappointment.

So perhaps I simply don’t aim for that level of joy in my life. Hardly the sign of a healthy individual, I know.

So what does my version of happiness look like? Something I deem as acceptable and safe. That won’t crush me in its absence?

Up until writing this today, I suppose I hadn’t given happiness much thought. I’d always considered that everyone’s happiness looked the same, felt the same, had the same expectation of it. …

We can do this together if we get out of our own way

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Image by Ashiq Raazz from Pixabay

I’m still a believer in humankind. But what other choice do we have?

We get tested — a lot recently, but if we don’t believe in humanity, then what is there?

What do we have to look forward to if not living this existence together in this melting pot called life?

Don’t get me wrong, I can despair as much as the next person, but ultimately, I’m optimistic. It’s a conscious choice, and I believe it’s essential to not living a jaded life.

“You must not lose faith in humanity. Humanity is an ocean; if a few drops of the ocean are dirty, the ocean does not become dirty.” …

And become stronger in the process

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Image by Ngoc Tang from Pixabay

We all try to avoid what we believe are ‘hard things’ from happening in our lives.

It’s human. We’re looking to survive every which way we can.

But this is the opportunity for growth, new understanding, and new resilience if we choose to face it head-on, not avoid and miss the lesson.

But it’s hard. We may see a neon sign in the distance, saying, “Wonderful Growth Opportunity here.” But that doesn’t make it any easier to suddenly find ourselves in the midst of a tough situation.

Perhaps we can remember the time you did survive what seemed an overwhelming and insurmountable crisis? The relief, possibly the joy, of seeing it through and somehow still being in one piece at the end. …

The fantasy of getting away from it all doesn’t work as well as we hoped

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Photo by FERESHTEH AZADI on Unsplash

Haven’t you fantasized about a new life, in a new city or town, or the woods, or the mountains? The things you’d do, the people you’d meet.

And in that fantasy, you’d taken on this calm, happy demeanor. You’re generous, less judgemental, more at ease in the world.

You’re content — finally.

The disappointing truth is that we take ourselves and our personal struggles with us. Our whole package, who we are.

Think about vacations you’ve taken and the fantasy of what it would be like — no worries, no calls, blue sky, sand. Bliss.

And then we discover that we’re still stressing about this or that. Some low level worry that’s nagging at the back of our mind. Perhaps we’re desperately trying to remember what was the last thing we forgot to do at work before we left. …



Compassionate champion of the human condition and its potential. In awe of this experiment called Life. Writes about emotions, acceptance, empathy, action.

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